I can’t tell you how many times I’ve had couples sit across from me, arms folded, eyes darting anywhere but toward each other, and say, “We almost didn’t come. We weren’t sure this would work. Especially online.” And I get it.
Online couples counseling can feel like a strange leap. When the person you love feels like a stranger, or worse, your enemy, the idea of logging into a therapy session from the same couch where your last fight happened might feel unbearable. But you’re here, reading this, which tells me you’re searching for something. Hope. A foothold. A way forward.
I want to talk to you about how online couples counseling actually works, and how it can work for you. Whether you’re trying to repair something broken or decide if it can be repaired at all, therapy can be the turning point. And yes, it can absolutely happen online.
The Myth That Online Therapy Isn’t “Real” Therapy
Let’s start here, because I hear this concern all the time: “But isn’t it better in person?” Maybe. Sometimes. But not always.
The truth is, I do both. I offer in-person sessions here in North Texas when it makes sense for a couple. But I also see many couples virtually—some who are a few blocks away, others who are cities apart. And I can tell you, with a full heart and a full caseload: online couples counseling works.
I’ve seen partners break decades of silence in a virtual room. I’ve watched couples hold each other’s hands again, sometimes metaphorically, sometimes literally, after the coldest of winters between them. I’ve helped people grieve the marriage they thought they had, and then decide… together… what kind of relationship they want to build from here. None of that required a couch in my office.
“We Don’t Even Talk Anymore—How Can We Fix This Through A Screen?”
If you’re in the thick of it, if the trust is gone or the silence has grown too loud, I know how strange it can feel to open up in a virtual setting. I’ve had couples say, “We’re basically roommates,” or “He’s had multiple affairs and I don’t know if I can ever look at him the same way again.” Others tell me, “This is our last shot. It’s either therapy or divorce.”
In our online sessions, we start with what’s real. We make space for the grief, the rage, the guilt. I’m trained in PACT (Psychobiological Approach to Couple Therapy), which means I focus on helping you both regulate in real-time—body, mind, and emotion. That doesn’t change whether I’m in the room with you or on a screen. The work still happens.
The goal is not perfection. The goal is to stop weaponizing hurt and start protecting the relationship, if that’s what you choose. And if you decide you can’t stay together, we’ll walk that road too, with clarity and care. Online therapy offers space for both rebuilding and parting gracefully.
What Happens In An Online Couples Counseling Session?
It’s not so different from in-person work, except you get to bring your real-life setting into our work. Your couch, your home, your routines. In fact, sometimes that’s where the magic is.
We meet on a secure video platform. You don’t need to have all the right words. You just need to show up.
Here’s what you can expect:
- We start with structure. I guide the session. You don’t have to know how to begin or where to go.
- We name what’s happening beneath the surface. Often it’s not about the dishwasher or the text message… it’s about safety, loneliness, betrayal, or fear.
- We learn how to protect the relationship. That means learning to disagree without destroying each other. It means remembering that love is a verb, and security is a practice.
And I will say this, being online doesn’t make this less powerful. In fact, many of my clients feel safer opening up from their own space. They feel less watched, less judged, more honest. That intimacy can be the very thing that starts to rebuild connection.
When One Or Both Partners Are In Recovery
I work with a lot of couples navigating sobriety, especially when one partner is in recovery and the other is still reeling. Online therapy can be incredibly helpful here. It gives you both space and structure to talk about the damage addiction has done to the relationship and what it will take to rebuild.
I understand this work on a personal level. I grew up with a mother who got sober when I was a teenager. I know what it’s like to live in a house where everything feels like it could fall apart at any second. I also know what healing looks like. I’ve seen couples, even after years of substance-fueled chaos, rebuild trust, set boundaries, and fall back in love.
That kind of work can happen right there at your kitchen table. Online couples counseling can hold it all.
For The Guilty, The Betrayed, The Hopeless
If you’re reading this and thinking, “I don’t even know if they’ll ever forgive me,” or “I’ve said things I can’t take back,” or “I’m terrified they’re going to leave me”—I want you to know that you are not alone.
There is no “bad guy” in most of the stories I hear. There’s just pain. Pain that went unspoken for too long. Partners who began living parallel lives instead of shared ones. Affairs, betrayals, silence, resentment. And underneath it all? A longing to be understood. Loved. Safe.
If you feel like this is your last resort, you’re not the only one. Many of the couples I work with come in on the edge. And many (many) find their way back.
How Do We Know If It’s Working?
Online couples therapy isn’t a magic wand. But you’ll know it’s working when things start to feel different.
- You fight, but you recover faster.
- You listen, even when it’s hard.
- You stop treating each other like threats.
- You start making decisions as a team again.
I teach couples how to co-regulate, how to repair after conflict, and how to prioritize the relationship above all else… not the job, not the kids, not the bank account. Because when you protect the relationship, everything else has a better chance of thriving.
Logistics: What You’ll Need
- A device with a camera and microphone (a laptop or tablet works great)
- A quiet, private space for sessions
- A stable internet connection
- A willingness to show up—even when it’s hard
If you can manage those, you’re ready.
Choosing To Begin
I named my practice Finding Peace because that’s what I believe we’re all searching for—peace in our relationships, our families, our pasts, ourselves. If you’re here because your relationship is hurting, I want you to know that peace is still possible. Healing is still possible. Even now. Even here.
Online couples counseling can be your next right step. And if you choose to work with me, we’ll walk it together with honesty, courage, and compassion. Curious about how online couples counseling could work for your relationship? Reach out. I’d love to hear your story.
